Sitting on the only remaining seat on the L train, covered in black leather with faded flecks of gold is her purse. You know her. She’s the one who appears oblivious to how many people are standing. She makes herself appear busy by having her thumbs do a drum solo on her iPhone. But really she is just daring you to ask her for the seat. In fact, now her leg covered by the black and cream diamonds on her dress inches over to protect her valuables. And then when her stop arrives, she pushes, and demands the standees move aside so the queen may exit.
First, welcome to all the babies born today! It is a very special day for most of us. And you too!! Hopefully in your future, you will wonder why we made such a big fuss over “your birthday.”
Barack Obama, an African American will become our 44th president. What is remarkable about this is? ….well, simply that. Also he may be the first president to be called the “n” word. What is the “N” word?” Never mind. What’s really important is it means any baby-brown, yellow, black, able or disabled, male or female,gay or straight(not sure how many of you know yet about the gay-straight thing) can reallistically strive to be whatever they want to be.
You hopefully won’t understand this, but for most of us, we bought into the idea that only certain people could be President, or part of “his” inner circle. And so we kept nominating and electing the same types of people over and over.
And as you will learn, some have defined insanity as doing the same thing over and over, expecting different results. Well this time, we considered different choices and we had different results. And we have a cabinet that reflects options for all of you new borns.
Baby, you really can be whatever you want. So learn from President Obama, and aim for the moon, and shoot for the stars.
From those of us,
who gave up on dreams and settled for status quo.
I read an article about New Years resolutions today. Its usually the same content the papers have every year about peoples desire to lose weight and stop smoking. In fact, it is so redundant, they could print the same article every year and I doubt anyone would notice the difference.
So I thought to myself, why not simplify this, and come up with one small goal that most of us could achieve- An apology-amends-an I’m sorry to one person in your life.
For those of you, who don’t have much experience doing this, let me explain. Identify someone you believe you have hurt with your words or actions, seek them out, and either write, email, call, or talk in person to them. Simply state the following, “I’m sorry for___________.
Some of you are probably saying, “but he/she did this to me…will they apologize for what they did….It”s not fair that I have to…what if they tell me what I lousy person I am and pile it on because I owned up to being at fault…will this be an admission of guilt? Blah, Blah, Blaah, Blah. Bullsh5$@^t!
Don’t complicate this. Just find a friend, lover, colleague, family member, store clerk-anyone you believe deserves an apology from you because of something you said or did. But what if I can’t come up with anyone? How will I know if I owe an apology? Here are some examples.
Did you lie, yell, blame, judge, criticize, shame, steal, mistreat physically, verbally, or emotionally, effect another person in a way that made them feel like a bad person? If the answer is yes, apologize. Ok, you want more specific examples.
If you yelled at your kid and he freaked out; If you called your significant other names; If you blamed someone else at work for your mistake- If you come up with ideas, then attempt to justify it as not really being something worthy of an apology-then it qualifies for an apology.
I believe it is an attainable goal for the new year. I’d like to hear examples of what others might apologize for.
Christmas is overwhelming for me. I experience so much pressure to buy or give, and yet it can feel pretty forced. So the spirit of giving happens spontaneously, it means more to me. So here is my experience of the magic of Christmas.
Last Sunday, it was about -4 degrees in the city. We had been in the house all day. So my wife and oldest son decided to go for a short walk around the block, while I stayed and played with my younger son. Shortly after leaving the house, the door bell rang. It was my wife and son. “We need some muscle to move a car,” she said.
A twenty something year old boy living at a place called, “Artist in Residence” was trying to get his car out of a snow packed parking spot. So we rocked his car, told him not to burn so much rubber, and eventually got him back on the road. It felt like the right thing to do. And I liked that our son experienced the moment.
On Monday, my wife called me at work. “You remember the artist with the skull & crossbones on his car-the one we pushed out of the snow? He left us a box of choclates with a note to the family that went out of its way to help me out.”
It was a complete surprise. To me, it combines the message of Christmas. You give to others with the nothing more than the best of intentions and then you move on. And sometimes, when you least expect it, something good comes back your way.
I laugh every time I see the advertisement for the “snuggie.”I don’t know
if it is the images and voice overs that makes it funny or simply the product.
So when I went to review it on youtube, I was pleasantly surprised to see
a number of paraodies, such as the “the cult of Snuggie.” Also I happened
upon another product, the “Slanket.”
I laughed so hard at the images of this guy at a baseball game with his
“slanket” on. I have no idea whether the “slanket” exists or not. But I love
the name of the product.
So as our nation appears to be falling on hard times, we are seeking some
comfort. However not in the form of a hug from another human being,
but rather in a blanket with sleeves. Hopefully four of them will be waiting
on Pennsylvania Avenune to welcome the President Elect and his family.
The Cult of Snuggie:
I recently saw this advertisement in the New York Time. The head line was,
“How to talk to your kids about drugs if you did drugs. It was a full page
ad sponsored by the Partnersip for a Drug-Free America. You probably
remember the “this is your brain…this is your brain on drugs” campaign.
On balance, I tend to think they offer the best in public health messages.
But this message was unique.
This puts responsibility on the parents to work with their children to
prevent drug and alcohol abuse. One way is to help parents to overcome their
own ambivalence about being confronted with questions about their own
drug and alcohol history. This is in great contrast to prior messages,
that hope children or teens will simply say “no.”
Since the holidays are a time when families come together, it’s also a time
when drug and alcohol abuse tend to increase. Therefore it seems like a
good time to consider having a talk with your kids. And in order to help us do
so, the Partnership for a Drug Free America offers some guidance.
1.) This isn’t about you.
2) Think about how much your kids wants or needs to know. The fact
is we can all say too much.
3) Many experts suggest giving an honest answer or none at all.
4) Avoid giving your child more information than they have asked for.
5) Say what you mean to say, don’t beat around the bush “I don’t want
you to use drugs.”
6) Share what you’ve learned from your experience with drugs.
7) Try connecting around the reasons you might have used, such as,
“I thought I needed to use to fit in..It took me awhile to realize it wasn’t a
8) Everyone makes mistakes, and trying drugs was a mistake I made. I love
you to much to watch you repeat bad decisions I made.
9)I wanted to share my experience with you, because even if drugs didn’t
ruin my life, I’ve seen them ruin other people’s lives.
10) Ask what they think. Keep asking questions and keep listening to
11) Stay Calm. Try not to raise your voice. It’s ok to admit these conversations
aren’t easy for you either.
12) If you’re nervous, don’t put off having the conversation. This isn’t
about your past. It’s about your child’s future.
For more information, go to drugfree.org
Don\'t be a Patsy
While typing this, one of the men working in our house, asked me a question which I couldn’t answer. He and his partner are walking around my house in their socks, as though they live here shouting to one another in Albanian. It made me wonder about people who make a living doing work in people’s homes.
Don’t get me wrong, I understand that people need money. Moreover people need to work where they can find employment. However I don’t think everyone is cut out for working in someones home. I think it would be hard to meld into someone else’s world, if only for a short period of time.
I’m always amused by how many people prepare their homes for the coming of the cleaning lady. And once the cleaning begins, I’m not sure who is more concerned about the house us or the cleaning lady. It’s like we have to remind ourselves she is working for us.
Baby sitters are like this too. They come to take care of the kids and then after awhile, they are snuggling up on the couch with a blanket over them or enjoying dinner with the kids. I don’t really mind it, but I do find it amusing and curious. I don’t know that I could blend in so well into someones home. But these people hang out, enjoy our space as if it is their own, do their job and then leave. And with babysitters, it seems like many of them find it hard to leave once they’ve set down roots in the house.
What kind of person is drawn to connecting with another family so intimately and why? I smile wondering if we’ll soon get into fightswith the plumbers, babysitters, or cleanning lady over what show to watch on the tv.